My Secret Life as Candid Admission

Yesterday on Channel 7 I was outed as a high class escort named Candid Admission. It was a busy day for me. I had waved my kids off to the bus stop in my flannel PJ's and singlet top before dashing out to the supermarket to stock up on groceries and sex toys, and then changing into my leather crop top with metal zip detail and gold hotpants for a few hours work at the brothel. You can imagine how exhausted I was by the time I got to the studio for my Big Reveal. My cab ride took longer than expected because we did a contra deal, so I didn't even have time to change my clothes. Luckily, I was only filmed from the mid torso up so you can't see my hotpants and thigh high fishnets under the table.

The response to my disclosure was incredibly positive. My mother was very proud, telling me she just wished that my dear grandmother Pussy Yum Yum was still alive to watch my triumph. The kids' school asked me to come in and talk to the Year 12's at Careers Day. And my LinkedIn account was flooded with requests to connect on a professional level.

And it was a true relief to get it off my chest and to finally live my truth. Kerri is a lie. Candid Admission has no lies. I am ready to go out into the world and be Candid. One chapter of my life has closed, but a new chapter is beginning. 

As for the escort work making me a better mum, that was just a line to sell my story. Naps and earplugs and a nightly gin and tonic make me a better mum. But you already knew that.

Disclaimer: I am not really an escort. I was discussing the escort Samantha X on The Daily Edition when this caption came up. Still, it's nice to know I have career options.....