December 9, 2013

#MyFirst... Bestie

Each Monday I will be writing about a First. I will choose the First (first kiss? first drink? first fight? first phobia?)I will post the topic here and write my own little piece about it. And I will invite YOU to write about your own First on your blog anytime during the week. If you have never experienced that particular first, write about why not. And how you feel about that.
Then add your blog post via the linky below, and/or tweet it under the hashtag #MyFirst.

Today's topic is My First... Bestie

Childhood memories are a funny thing. They come in fragments. They weave in and out of your mind like dreams. You catch a corner of them and then, just as you're trying to hold them in your hand, they disappear. You remember a glimpse, but then you're not sure you've actually got it right.

They glint in the light. They shimmer. You look too closely and they disappear.

This is not me. But THIS is what I remember.

Here are some things I remember about my first best friend. I'll call her Sue.
  • Sue was an only child. This solitude was compensated for by a menagerie of animals. In my mind, there were three dogs, a cat, two birds, some fish and some mice. I have no idea if I've made up the mice, but I'm pretty sure the rest were there. Their house always had a faint smell of dog. I loved it. It smelled like home.
  • Sue's parents were heaven. They drank Coffee Mate with their coffee every morning and I thought it was the ultimate in sophistication and I drank it with them. Thus began a serious addiction which lasted well into my twenties. I am craving that creamy sweetness right now
  • One holiday Sue's family took me along on a caravan trip with them. It was one of the best weeks of my life. I remember nothing of the caravan, I just remember the closeness I felt with Sue and her parents. (Literally, no doubt. We were in a caravan.)
  • Sue and I spent hours in her bedroom, reading the books we both liked to read (think 'Flowers In The Attic' and boarding school tales). On one of these nights Sue noticed me surreptitiously using a page in her book to floss my teeth. I was hideously embarrassed. I still wish I'd asked for a toothpick.
  • Sue grew up a little before me, both physically and emotionally. We both started liking boys at the same time, but she felt confident actually doing something about that, whilst the boys themselves still utterly terrified me. That was when things began to fall apart.
  • There was the time at the beach, when Sue told that cute boy that I liked him. "Which one is she?" he asked her. "The flat one?" "She's just starting," Sue replied. I wanted to die.
  • After she hit puberty, Sue grew tired of me. She found a new friend, and just stopped speaking to me. It was terrible. I cried endless tears. I tried ringing her up at home and talking to her. She spoke with me on the phone, and I felt that everything was alright again. The next day at school, she ignored me again.
  • Eventually, we patched up our relationship enough to be friendly throughout the end of high school. But it was never the same, and when school finished we pretty much parted ways. It was okay, though. It was time to say goodbye.
There are more memories. I am sure they are more. But they are floating just beyond my mind. I do know that I loved that girl, and her family, and that our friendship was a fundamental part of my childhood.

Friendships don't always last a lifetime. But friendships don't have to last a lifetime to be meaningful and precious. And this one, this best friendship, meant an awful lot.

Next week's topic: My First... Fulfilled Wish


  1. Oh, this is a lovely one Kerri... I agree... childhood memories can be fleeting. Sometimes you can catch them drifting past, sometimes you can't...

    And those early break-ups are so difficult to understand and cope with...

    I'm cheating again this week... earlier this year I was going through some "issues" in my life and wrote a series of autobiographical posts about some of my early relationships... it was a kind of self-therapy, I guess... It actually helped... :)

    Anywey, here's my post about about my three "besties" from school - Hawkeye, B.J, and Charles:

  2. Beautiful. My first best friend at age 3 (at kindy) is still my friend today. She was the one I went on family holidays with and the one I wished was my sister. Forty seven years on and we can still rock an hour long phone convo after not seeing or speaking to each other for over a year. Friends have always been my family. Still are. And might I add that friends I have made later in life are just as precious to me - it's not the length of the friendship but the depth. xx

  3. Added my link. My BFF was my neighbour and (as we lived in a small town) we pretty much lived in each other's pockets. I'm sure we fought and had our occasional bouts of jealousy but don't really remember any of that. Nowadays my closest friends are some friends from my Uni days. We see each other less now, but that never seems to matter.

  4. I was looking through old photo's and i actually saw an oldie of me and my BFF when little it's the only one i have here the others are at my parents place i think :-) After 30+ years we are having coffee and meeting up so excited. Wonder if we will just chat as if we never lost contact .. Will keep you posted. x

  5. The way you describe your memories is lyrical and true - "they weave in and out of your mind like dreams..." Your post captures so much of the essence of childhood friendships :)

  6. I know! Read on your blog! Can't wait to hear the outcome x

  7. And that's what true friendship means. x

  8. Yes. So true. And you're right about Flowers. That stuff was seriously SICKO!

  9. Hi Kerri - I've just discovered your #myfirst Mondays and have linked up for this week :-) First besties are so special. I know mine was and still is. I thought I had heaps of photo's of us together but have realised they are all still in albums at Mum and Dad's house. Must confess that I too have flossed my teeth with the page of a book (shhh dont tell anyone)!!

  10. So lovely Kerri. You are right, some friendships don't need to last a lifetime to mean the most.

  11. I am unsure how to link my blog, but you can find it here. Whilst some friends come and go, some you just never want to loose.

  12. I just went to my high school bestie's wedding. We lost touch around uni, then reconnected about 5 years ago and have stayed friends since. We first met 31 years ago. Her wedding was across the other side of the country and she was thrilled that I went. We still connect - it's like the missing 20 years never happened :-0)

  13. I have added my first bestie, could write screeds more about my second!

  14. mwahh... it's all I have to say

  15. Jo @ BabbleOn City blogDecember 10, 2013 at 11:39 AM

    Aaahhhh yes ... Flowers in the Attic. I giggle now just thinking about it ... but back in the day I was shocked and appalled! ... jx

  16. I loved the bitter sweet memories you portray here Kerri, along with the whimsical and humorous moments. Love your ability to hone in to the tiny detail that makes such a big impression when your reader engages with it :)

  17. Sorry I am late this week, can I use the Christmas season as an excuse? Also, I apologize that I did change the title a bit on my blog post ... "bestie" is so ... well, Australian!


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