Give The Woman Some PRIVACY

Poor Nigella Lawson. For those who have been in a cave these past 24 hours, she was photographed by paparazzi being abused by her husband, Charles Saatchi. Actually, let me rephrase that. I am not happy with the passive tense. The paparazzi photographed Charles Saatchi abusing his wife. So Nigella was a victim in two senses. For a start, she was a victim of her husband's abuse. And for another, she was a victim of the cold, money-grubbing photographer, who stood there filming as a female person was being attacked by male.

What a world we live in.

Many women are abused by their partners and I feel for them all. And hopefully Nigella is in a better position than many, in that she will have the financial resources to support herself if she chooses to leave her spouse. So many women do not have that luxury. So many women are forced to stay in abusive relationships because they simply do not have anywhere else to go.

However, Nigella has a disadvantage that most of us can not fathom. She is a celebrity. And as someone who has recently gone through a personal crisis of my own, I cannot even imagine the nightmare of having to live out my most intimate moments in the public eye.

I used to want to be famous. Like, super famous. When I became a woefully unsuccessful child actor, my principle motivation was not the love of theatre, nor even the joy of being in front of the camera; it was the promise of having my picture in TV Week. Once that happened, I lost interest in the whole thing.

But had I kept at acting, and had I actually shown some promise, I could have been super famous by now. I could have had paparazzi following me down the street. I could have been photographed through my bedroom window, or when I was out walking on Bondi beach. And when I was young, that sounded like excellent fun.

Now, at 44, with all sorts of life experiences behind me, I am grateful that particular childhood dreams never came true. I am grateful that I have had the opportunity to deal with my private dramas privately. And I feel deep sympathy for those who have to live out their traumas in the public eye.

I hope Nigella Lawson finds the space she needs away from the prying eyes of the world. And I hope the next time a photographer sees a person in need, they will rush to assist them instead of standing at the sidelines taking pictures. Compassion, people. COMPASSION.