August 26, 2010

Listen To Me!

This Sunday I will be speaking on a panel at the Sydney Jewish Writers Festival about ‘Going Online’. It is a topic very close to my heart, as I spend half my life on the computer, which, considering another third of my life is spent asleep, is a very high percentage indeed.

Being so knowledgeable about the online world, I am extremely comfortable discussing it. This makes a nice change for me from the discussion of most topics, when I really just make things up to try to look wise. Luckily, I’m pretty good at bluffing, and most of my contributions can be mistaken for genuinely insightful contributions to the discussion, if cleverly combined with a raised eyebrow and a look of pensive intelligence. I am also quite skilled at the knowing nod, which I apply when I have absolutely no idea what other people are talking about, but wish to look like I do.

Happily, I can speak about Going Online without needing to nod knowingly (though of course I am delighted to do so if one of my fellow panelists makes an excellent point, or says something extremely obscure that I don’t understand). I am familiar with the online world. It is my home. I love it. In fact, sometimes I fear I love the online world more than the real world, so warm and welcoming it is to me.

My online life consists of my blog, Twitter, and guest posting on other blogs. And the experience is always incredibly positive.

All the comments left by readers on posts I have written are supportive and complimentary, and if they are not, I just delete them. All the people I meet on Twitter are hilarious and have interesting things to say, and if not, I just block them from my account. This is very different to the real world, in which I get negative feedback fairly regularly (particularly from my three young children) and meet people who say things like ‘That’ll be $17.50’, and ‘Can you make sure you sign your daughter’s homework diary every day’.

No wonder I spend so much time with my head in cyberspace. It’s nice here. And I know what I’m doing. All I have to do is write about myself and my life, which fortunately requires very little research, because I detest research. What’s more, for the first time in my life, I feel like an expert in my field. After years in other professions in which I had to pretend to be competent (helped greatly by the donning of a business suit and high heels) I actually am competent. It’s quite exciting, really.

So come and see me talk about my work. I’ll dazzle you with my knowledge about myself, my blog and my views on my life. Just for godsake don’t throw any questions at me about politics, or history, or philosophy, or the arts.

Not unless you want to get the knowing nod.


  1. Happy chatting & a good nod to something you've said yourself, only makes it even more real, true & worthy. Look at politians, they are constantly reinforcing their own point of view by agreeing with themselves. You'll nail it.
    I like happy blog world, it's nice here, mummies, craft, giggles, real world scary - or Canberra right now, almost snowing, brrrr. Good luck, love Posie

  2. And chocolate. You know about chocolate!

    Wish I could be there on Sunday. Unfortunately I will be on the other side of the continent assisting my son to get into character as one of the 50 pairs of legs for Sammy the Dragon in the Broome Pearl Festival. As I know nothing about dragons I will be nodding a lot too.

    Good luick. Love your work. x

  3. The echo chamber online is one of the greatest and worst things about it. Being supported by the likeminded is wonderful, but never having your views challenged by others leads to the Senator Fieldings and Family Firsts of the world.

    If the online world was transferred to real life, we'd all end up like Lindsay Lohan.

  4. I should temper that with the comment that as far as I can tell, you are never wrong about anything.

    Except chocolate.

    Don't block me because I'm challenging.

  5. I have no words, because you tell it exactly how it is. Have fun talking about the online world. (And I'm still undecided about the chocolate ... may need to research that one a bit more).

  6. Kerri I wish, wish, wish I could be there. I know you will be brilliant. How could you not be?
    *nods wisely* ;)

  7. Hope it went well. Actually, delete that, how could it not have gone well?


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